ci: add selective wheel test plumbing

[kkraus14]

Important

Stack dependency: PR 3 of 4. Builds on #2464 and #2465, which have merged. #2467 depends on this PR.

Merge order: #2464 (merged) -> #2465 (merged) -> #2466 (this PR) -> #2467. All branches live in the kkraus14 fork and target upstream main.

What

• Replace the negative bindings-only skip switch with default-on test inputs for every package.
• Gate package wheel downloads, compiled test fixtures, sanitizer setup, and individual suites on those positive selections.
• Keep nightly callers unchanged through default-on inputs.
• Make metapackage-only smoke tests install the exact local cuda-pathfinder and cuda-bindings wheels in one resolver transaction while released dependencies continue to come from configured indexes.
• Keep Python 3.15 NumPy index setup aligned with every selected suite that can resolve NumPy, including metapackage-only tests.

Why

The final planner needs to select each package test suite independently without losing the artifacts and setup needed by downstream tests.

Behavior before activation

Every new test input defaults to true. The top-level CI caller translates its existing negative bindings selection to the equivalent positive test-bindings value, while nightly callers continue to omit the new inputs. Test coverage remains unchanged until the orchestration PR supplies selections for every package.

Validation

• Rebased onto current main after ci: add selective sdist build plumbing #2465 merged; the final diff contains only the two reusable wheel-test workflows and their ci.yml caller update
• Full targeted pre-commit hooks for all changed workflows
• YAML and GitHub Actions lint
• Linux/Windows review of artifact, Python 3.15, backport, nightly, and metapackage-only paths

Related to #299.

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[github-actions]

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[mdboom]

Approving. With one naming nit that you can take or leave.